Were you like me?  Did you go into  days, maybe even weeks,  of mourning when Kraft announced it would no longer be manufacturing those rolls of garlic cheese?  I’m not just talking being a little “down-in-the-dumps” mopey; I’m talking major, life-altering, depression.  I do, after all, live in THE SOUTH where making garlic cheese grits is as essential as breathing.  Seriously.  Would I kid you?

I mean, Kraft Garlic Cheese even has its own Facebook page so you just know it’s loved by gazillions.  Maybe even more?

I’ve tried all sorts of substitutions, such as this one from Food.com:

“Chef 1075415 wrote:
I am also looking for a replacement for the Kraft Garlic Cheese log to make cheese grits. I saw this on another message board and thought I’d share! I’m making cheese grits for Christmas brunch, so I hope it works!
Garlic Cheese Rolls
11/2 pounds sharp cheddar cheese, grated
1/2 pound processed cheese product such as Velveeta
3 ounces cream cheese
1 teaspoon seasoned salt
Garlic powder to taste
Soften cheeses and mix all together well. Shape into four rolls and wrap well in foil or plastic wrap.”

While it comes close, Hubby keeps saying. “something is missing.”  And you know what that means.

I tried the Velveeta (you do know Velveeta, don’t you?) and garlic route.  That didn’t work either.  And the can of squeeze cheese?  Nope.  Nada. No way Jose.

Deep South Dish has a substitute recipe that I have seen quoted in several locations that is quite similar to the one from Chef 107415 (how does he/she remember all of those numbers – does that tell you something about me?)  Since I have yet to try that one, I’ll leave it to you to give it a try and voice your opinion.  Be sure to let me know how that goes.

Okay.  I know that those of you outside of the boundaries of the Southern states (and those of us in Arkansas consider ourselves as southern as our friends and relatives in Alabama — but not those in Texas, ya’ know)  have probably never heard of grits much less than Kraft Garlic Cheese Roll, but many of you had never heard of Rotel either until just a couple of years or so ago until your fellow friends here in the lower USA staged an intervention for you.  You can thank me in the comments for that little enlightenment. Rotel is NOT a substitute for a garlic cheese roll by the way.

I hear tell that there’s a little company in Minnesota making a cheese roll that might be a worthwhile substitute.  Unfortunately, when I tried to check on that, well it seems that quite a few of their products were under a recall notice.  I believe I’ll have to wait on that for a bit.  If, and when, they get rolling again (pun intended), I will order up a batch and give it a try.  How else am I gonna’ make our very favorite, to-die-for, Christmas and funeral  authentic garlic cheese ‘grits.  And what about Cheesy Spinach Dip.  Oh my.  I having such pain.

This struggle has been going on since Kraft did the unmentionable deed and decided NOT to make our beloved garlic cheese roll.  How could they?  They must have sold million of those babies in the South alone.  Was there a coup in the company? 

 By the way, if you are one of the poor unfortunates who has ordered and been dealt those gosh-awful bowls of soupy, tasteless so-called cheesy grits at one of the several chain restaurants claiming to be serving such, well don’t hold those monstrosities against the G.R.I.T.S.  We know better than to EVEN let that mess touch our lips.  Stay away from that temptation at all costs.  (If you’re one of THOSE restaurants committing this crime against cheesy grits, I should probably warn you that I can name names if a battle is waged.  Do me a favor and get some true advice about improving your preparation before continuing to blaspheme the name of Garlic Cheese Grits.) 

 To reach the Kraft kitchens and request they revive Kraft Garlic Cheese roll, call 1-800-847-1997 and follow the prompts.  Tell ’em I sent you if you want.  Or, you can go here and use your voice and your vote!  Do it today!  Your sisters in the South are depending on you.  We’ve suffered far too long.  In the meantime, make up a batch of these cheesy grits…they’re mighty tasty even if they aren’t the tried and true REAL thing.

How about you? How do you align on the issue of garlic cheese grits?

Swan.  I’ll believe I need to go take a seltzer and lie down.  I’m all tuckered out from taxing by brain so.  As my friend Scarlet would say, “Tomorrow is another day.”  Maybe Kraft will see the error of its ways and the South will rise again?  Or at least the garlic cheese roll.